To Matthew Africa, One Month Later

A month ago today, many of us lost a dear friend, our beloved Matthew Africa. And, while I was as thunderstruck as the rest of the Bay Area music community (and beyond) who knew and admired him, it seems everyone else acted quickly to memorialize him, wrote eloquently about his many fine qualities, and shared a thousand sweet memories of him with the rest of us who were in mourning. I, on the other hand, quietly sat aside, trolling the web, reading those stories, and mourning this loss more on my own. But, upon waking up this morning and realizing that this world has had to carry on for a whole entire month without Matthew in it, I was struck by how sad that is, and was moved to speak.

Matthew was one of the kindest, gentlest, most articulate and intelligent human beings I've ever known. His musical knowledge was vast and humbling. And, his humility about that made it even more unreal.

I met Matthew 13 years ago, when I came to KALX as a brand new volunteer, working on a public affairs program that followed his DJ set at the time. The setting of a college radio station where volunteering music nerds are asked to work side by side with one another is a ripe environment for all kinds of social experiments. Hazing the newbies is part of the national past-time in places like that. And, if you're not acting cold and unfriendly to them for sport, then you're doing it for lack of your own social skills that make you adept at getting to know people easily. Matthew didn't have either problem. While he was 4 or 5 years older than me in KALX years, he was incredibly kind and patient, always a friendly, smiling face in the studio, and good enough at socializing to learn my name and use it, making me feel like I was being recognized. I always said that he was my first friend at the station.

And, musically speaking, Matthew was a revered KALX DJ who impressed, and to some extent, intimidated, many of us. To the point that when I found out he had reviewed an aircheck tape I submitted at the station for approval to be able to DJ any time of the day or night on the KALX schedule, I was really nervous about it. During a programmers' meeting one night, Matthew passed my tape and his review to me without being about to say a word for the moment. I tried to calmly open up the review, read it quickly, and upon seeing that he had said a number of kind things about my DJ skills and only gave me one little piece of very helpful and legitimate constructive criticism (and he approved me to DJ all the slots on the program schedule), I casually closed up the review and sat there for the rest of the meeting working to contain my excitement. At one point, Matthew caught my eye and, in trying to play it cool, I just sort of half-smiled at him. So cool was I, and so considerate and thoughtful was he, that immediately after the meeting ended, Matthew came over to me and asked me if I was okay. Out of respect for our friendship, he was worried that my half-smile after he saw me read the review was some sort of indication that I was upset at him for the one little piece of advice he was giving me. I had to tell him just how completely unnecessary his concern was and exactly how happy he had made me! It breaks my heart how sweet that moment was every time I think of it now.

Fast forward 11 years, and after circling each other around KALX for much of that time, then losing touch at some point, I found myself looking for work at Youth Radio, a training organization for young people in radio and media production, where Matthew also happened to be a DJ on a streaming music service there (All Day Play). The day I went for a tour of Youth Radio and was told that he was DJ'ing there was the first day I knew where he had taken up residence after his long tenure at KALX ended. Days later, when I was offered the job there, I was told by my boss-to-be that she had run into Matthew before that and told him I was being considered for a position there. She reported that he gave me a glowing reference, saying that I was "drama-free," which was all she seemed to care about. Even though the professional references I provided her were high-ranking staff at the FCC, previous Presidents of a national community radio organization, and heavy-hitters like that, the E.D. of Youth Radio checked in with Matthew to find out if I'd be an asset to the organization, and he knew exactly how to describe me to make me look good.

My two years at Youth Radio allowed me the opportunity to see Matthew about once a week, when he would come in for his DJ set most Friday nights. Most of those occasions, Matthew would slip in quietly and get to work in the studio and I would forget that he was there (because he rarely got on mic) until I heard a great track start that only he could play, or a sublime segue lead into a fantastic song I'd never heard before and then I would remember that it was Friday, and Matthew was on the decks in the room 2 doors down from my office. Or, Matthew would be coming out of the darkened studio for a glass of water or to point out the location of the restroom to the guest he had with him in studio, and I would then follow him back into the studio and hover while he put his headphones on cockeyed so he could get back to work, but still show me that he was available to talk should I want to say anything. Oftentimes, he would close down his set and I would walk him out of the studio and leave work too. That's how I got to spend more time with my friend, Matthew, in these past couple of years than ever before.

Every 3 months, Youth Radio would graduate a batch of students who went through the programs, and as director of those programs, I was in charge of organizing the graduation ceremonies. For the last Youth Radio graduation ceremony that I presided over this past June, I was stuck for a keynote speaker because folks had fallen through on me. In a pinch, I turned to a friend whom I knew would have the cred to deliver a speech about DJ'ing and who the young people would recognize. I was also hoping that, as a friend, he wouldn't be mad about the late invitation. With only a few days' notice, Matthew was not only characteristically gracious about accepting what would normally be considered an offensive last-minute "honor," he bent over backwards to accommodate our schedule, and spoke from the heart to deliver the BEST, most appropriate and inspiring speech I've ever heard at a Youth Radio graduation. An interview was shot of Matthew prior to his giving the keynote speech in which he was asked to talk about his experience as a professional DJ. An edited version of that has been posted on Youth Radio's YouTube account, but I've seen the uncut version of that interview and you see a lot more of Matthew's charm, warmth, and good humor come through in that!

The day after I found out about Matthew's untimely passing, I also lost my job at Youth Radio, and that night, I was glad of the timing. It's not a coincidence to me that Matthew had a hand in my getting that job, and when he was no longer able to be there, I wouldn't have to be either. I'm happy I never had to be at Youth Radio on a Friday night without my dear friend in the studio nearby, spinning his beloved music for the world to enjoy. I'm proud to have known him in this really special way.

"Good-night, sweet prince; And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest."